Well im going to schedule my 2nd GMAT on the 9th of Janauary 2005. i have decided that im going to go for it, i have umpteen excuses to give myself to go for it in 2006. Well i know the work pressure is going to be at its highest in the last 1 yr for me, but then i feel i have let excuses rule my life so far this time Im going to fight it out hard and try to come out successful. Well my plan goes somethign like this :-

1. GMAT preparation.
2. 4 Essays to be completed before the end of this month. That is about an essay a week from now, which i know is again going to be really challenging but then I claim and also feel that i love to work in tight deadlines and for long days in whatever little opportunity i have got. This is going to be deciding in how much i can commit and how much I deliver. Im game for this.. it is going to get into full throttle from today.

well the reason that im pushing this hard is in case ( i know it is a big ? as of today) then i can be rest assured that i have throw my perennial problem of procrastination out forever. let me see.. i will keep updating with more of a detailed schedule of my GMAT prep and my progress..

This task has got more to do with proving a point to myself than gettting into ISB.. Let me see am trying to give a new perspective to my fight to get into a B School...

well it has been 6 months since my last post on the blog and i know these are the heights of irregularity. Well these 6 months were supposed to be the make or break period for me in my career, either i could have pushed on the gas pedal and gone to a different orbit or laze around where i was already. well so far im doing the latter. CAT came and went , i had requested for an appointment with GMAT and it breezed across and am almost at the end of yet another calendar. An year which i thought would redefine my career and one in which i resolved to really turn a new chapter has only belied all expectations. But I still have a chance, irrespective whether i take ISB or not i need to get a call to prove to myself that it is time i either shrug this side of mine or sink into it and lie forever. For making the ISB dream happen i know i have a big task at hand. My schedule goes somethign like this till the break of new year and probably even into the first week of the new year. GMAT study (have to up the score to around 730's), essays and recos . All these together at the same would be considered a cardinal sin by most bschool aspirants or the bschool inmates but then thatz wat i have at hand now and am keen to do it well and find success at the end of the journey.
Well one thing i would like to tell myself is once you decide on something stick on to it put your heart into it and never roll back or be depressed by any setbacks on the way. Well this the biggest blunder i have committed so far in my life. Taking important decisions too slow and late and then drooling over the rightness of the same. This has defnitely set me back by almost 3 yrs in my life, but then i hope that i get determined never to again let this happen at any stage in my life again. A lesson learnt early. Lets see how things go.. Im not gona wait till January 1 to uptake all this transformation, it is going to start today December 1 2004. It is a test to see if a totally different perspective to the way one lives can be achieved by sheer resolve and determination. Well only time will tell..

At the Sentosa Island, Singapore 

Me at Oracle HQ. 

'The Art of Negotiation'
_______________________________________________________
Israel Prime Minister meets PLO Chief Arafat to find peace on the Middle East conflict. Before the negotiation starts, Prime Minister requests that
he be allowed to begin with a story. With full agreement from Arafat, he begins.

"Years before the Israelites came and settled in the Promised Land, Moses led them for 40 years through the desert. One day, the Israelites began complaining that they were thirsty and, lo and behold, a miracle occurred and a stream appeared before them. They, including Moses, drank their fill and then decided to take advantage of the stream to do some bathing. When Moses came out of the water, he found that all his clothing was missing.

'Who took my clothes?'Moses asked those around him. 'It was the Palestinians,' replied the Israelites". "Wait a minute," objected Arafat immediately, "there were no Palestinians during the time of Moses!"

Prime Minister calmly says, "All right, now we've got that settled, we shall begin our talk"

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"The journey of a caterpillar being transformed into a butterfly is a romantic one,but the experience is not a pleasant for the caterpillar.In the process of that transformation,it goes blind,its arms and legs fall off,and its body is torn apart as the beautiful wings emerge"

Sumantra Ghoshal ,Management Guru on Leadership and Change

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Do What You Love
In 1960, a researcher interviewed 1500 business-school students and classified them in two categories: those who were in it for the money – 1245 of them – and those who were going to use the degree to do something they cared deeply about – the other 255 people. Twenty years later, the researcher checked on the graduates and found that 101 of them were millionaires – and all but one of those millionaires came from the 255 people who had pursued what they loved to do!
Now, you may think that your passion for Icelandic poetry of the baroque period, or butterfly collecting, or golf – or social justice – might consign you to a permanent separation between what you love and what you do for a living, but it isn't necessarily so. Vladimir Nabokov, one of the greatest novelists of this centurey, was far more passionate about butterfly collecting than writing. His first college teaching job, in fact, was in lepidoptery. REsearch on more than 400,000 Americans over the past 40 years indicates that pursuing your passions – even in small doses, here and there each day – helps you make the most of your current capabilities and encourages you to develop new ones.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Really Cool One Liners

Dreams - Don't be afraid of the space between your dreams and reality. If you can dream it, you can make it so.Don't ever let anyone steal your dreams.
Faith - Faith has to do with things that are not seen, and hope with things that are not in hand.
Ideas - A good idea plus capable men cannot fail; it is better than money in the bank.
Achievement - God will not look you over for medal, degrees or diplomas, but for scars.
Faith - Faith is an oasis in the heart which will never be reached by the caravan of thinking.
Character - Talents are best nurtured in solitude. Character is best formed in the stormy billows of the world.
Achievement - The achievements which society rewards are won at the cost of diminution of personality
Effort - What we hope ever to do with ease, we must learn first to do with diligence.

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bow lines. Sail away from safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore, dream, discover.

well to give an overview of everything else outside the World of MBA. Appa had the back operation and it was quite a sight and feeling for me to be at a hospital. I would rather say i have been really fortunate not to have been to the hospital as a patient or visitor at all so far in life until this happened. It was something which was totally new for all of us home. He should be back to normal in a few months and get back to his philanthrophic pursuits, which might have to be toned down henceforth.
Had a chance to watch Yuva..(Obviously where else !!!) Well not many people liked the movie for watever criticism of the episodic screenplay. But then ManiRatnam really thrills me probably, well not surely my views would be influenced by my like for the director. I just loved the way he stitched the three characters at a common point, it is something which is very new in Indian cincema.. This is something which i have always noticed in Mani's movies which probably gives a point to the critics that characters are not sketched too well on the screen but then the man has so many thoughts to put in the large canvas doesnt offer him the reels enough. This aspect was very visible in Yuva where he just zipped through certain portions even before the viewer could undrstand wat was happening it was gone. The best shots of the movie where ofcourse Abhishek's performance.. well the man really showed steel in the role and showed skin with Rani. Personally i luved the Ajay Devgan part, probably there was nothing in it. but then the point put forth and the rallying of youth to change the face of India from the clutches of politicians was something which i have been nurturing in my heart for long.. hence i felt very much attached to it and reinforced that i need to do an MBA and get famous and rich and get back to serve the country. This is probably my biggest motivation to go for it with full zorr...

well wat to say but tht this is atrocious... i will the most dubious distinction in the world for being the most lazy person.. this is jus getting too annonying for myself in the first place. am just not able to peak to my potential.. leave alone peaking am no way near even 10% of my top gear performance. Wat is more disgusting and alarming is that the goals i have set myself to conquer in the next 6-9 months are those that i have dreamt of for long and those which are most close and cherishable to my heart. I know the success in those endeavors will catapult me into a new league where i would be unique and away from the crowd and script huge success stories not just for myself but for ppl around me and some huge corporations. I just have to get out of this rust and really focus right from today well no but right from this moment because the opportunities and challenges ahead of my in that path are too big for me to lose bcoz of my procrastination (God Forbid noone should have this degree of this character as me ). Me just gona do it. Throw all my dirty past and get along because i need to get there at a B School to realise my dreams in life. It is not that am failing in my current job but then this is not something that gives me the satisfication bcoz i hav always dreamt of me as a leader and somebody in the forefront of decision making.
Then probably i have cleared my totally cluttered mind of thoughts and convinced myself about one thing for sure. Come what me i need to be at the IIM or ISB next summer and that this is my last chance to create and lead a life i had always dreamt of and tat i think im capable of succeding.

Well then got a feel of classrooms after nearly 2 1/2 yrs.. since the training at inautix... had test on the first class.. well i was really struggling though to get my mind running n thinking because of various reasons.. one it was morning 7am and two bcoz it has been ages since my brain has got rusted.. perhaps as there is a gym to tune n tone ur physical self.. ur mental thinking and exercising i personally feel go a longer way to help you feel confident , fresh and alert.. But then i had started on my journey for CAT. Today was the verbal reasoning class.. well i think this is one section i need to crack at CAT.. bcoz this is one section where i feel quite comfortable at teh start of the course itself.. So this weekend wd be for closing the probs in the TIME reasoning material!!!.. My love for the Dabba Dinner is over.. well it came to sudden end well dono y i felt it was too monotonous and tasting the same way.. so off i go to Balaji yet again :-(

To the other side of this is the debate on tv right now as Madame Sonia Gandhi indicated she would not like to be PM. The lowest levels the Congressmen would stoop to prove their loyalty to her is pathetic. They are fighting it out by putting the pride of the country and the people behind. Comments like 'India will become a terrorist country', 'India sarvanaash ho jaayega agar aap nahi aaye to'. First of all i dont understand y should the privated meeting of the Congress Parlimentary Party be wired live across the country.One just couldnt sit to hear all this.. Cant something be done about all this.. Cant all these parties the Congress , the Left who are just making a big tamaasha out there be brought to book. First they drive the investors crazy with reckless irresponsible statements about the markets and they play around to win political mileage just to elect a PM.. Well this is not to say other parties are any behind.. Well they have turned running a great country to a harakiri..
Perhaps never b4 would most of us have felt so passionate about all this happening to our MotherLand..

Well quite a eventful 3 days or so.. lots of disgust and anger flowing across the nation.. probably people who voted for congress at the centre and the lazy middle class which dint vote are cursing their decisions alike and both are equally to be blamed for the pathetic state of affaris in the last 3 days . The sensex crashed abt 500 points on friday itself... well ppl thought the worst was over. But those who instead of relaxing over the weekend surfing movie channels watched NDTV especially the two programs i die to watch over the weekend. The Big Fight and We The People not bcoz the progs or the panelists esp rajdeep sardesai offers any non partisan judgements but to know wat is the knowledge level of our politicians on key isses especially the economic.. and believe those who saw the comments of sick guys like Nirotpal Basu, Digvijay Singh and Sitaram Yetchury would have defnitely predicted a staggering fall of the market on monday thought not a 800 pt crash intraday. Comments like 'Political Stability no way influence the movement of markets' and stuff.. totally irresponsible talk by the Left and the inablity of the congress leadership( rather readership) to clarify it plunged n killed the market today.. It was pathetic watching it fall n fall esp after the first trading suspension the market opened for 3 mins n fell 300 pts.. jus unbelievable.. well the people of the country are almost feelin the pulse now of wat a grave mistake this govt wd be for them.. It is almost very visible people who voted for the Congress are now really realising the hurt of pride when the announcemnt of Sonia as PM came in.. well it would be naive to believe them if they say they voted for non-BJP and dint expect Sonia to become PM.. well it wsa well knwn these slaves of white skin the Left and all the "so called secular forces " would go behind her.. Well am feeling terrible to say am an Indian today with so many people feeling the same way but helpless.
Well then i took my first look into TIME and IMS amterial probably the first attempt at them since 3 yrs.. Well i need to crack it n get in.. Fine let me go now and catch up the update on NDTV today hope some bloody members of the Congress+ are grilled for making irresponsible statements before their so called common minimum programme.

well am bak to my old lazy habit it has been almost 20 days since i havent blogged well i cant recount much watz gone thru except the major events. This also means there is nothing happening much in my life.. well rather im not doing anything to change the monotony that has set in.. Well one good thing i have joined TIME about a week bak on May 6th but then am yet to flip a single page in it.. well my first impression of the intial brm is IMS was better.. but then it is too early to call upon and comment. Thats a criminal sin more so i aspire to be a Business leader. So i have started but then i jus wana kick off and get into the prep mode i knw thn nothing can stop me.. but am a really bad starter. I have rather got very complacent and taking life very easily i jus have to shake myself out totally.
Well then Sudeep has left today , its gona be tough for me out here then.. he was a guy at my wavelength here so we could share with trust and joy quite a few of the common things.. so i would be missing him.. well that is how life goes have to take it along.
The Other News is the marriage of N. Coming to the Big Story well it is really pathetic tht NDA has lost.. well i ahve nothing against the congress bcoz i feel it should have won at karnataka.. All this talk that the Indian voter is knowledgable n stuff is all pure nonsense.. They just vote for the sake of change, they vote where they get things free and can be influenced by few leaders rather 'clowns'. hence democracy is not the right way to rule India, bcoz i feel it makes sense only when your population is knowledgable and literate. It makes a lot of sense to have it in the United States. Accoriding to me the Indian Elections are a tamasha more like a One day contest where the winner is not always the better team.. More of this later.. bcoz am really aggrieved by the results this time around..

Well then three days of backlog.. not to say i was too busy but then had quite a few things to work on. especially few bugs which hav closed in pricing really deserve if not a pat atleast a tap on the head.. well then believe it or not i have got a gmail account.. well it is still in beta.. but i was desperate to catch hold of one.. well i dint get w/o my initials but then i got wat i wanted.. shd be grateful to blogger which gave me the invite.. well looks v.v.v.fast ofcourse less traffic n other umpteen parameters could be playing a big part.. but then the UI is non slick n rather light.. like how rediff and yahoo were in their intial days later some gentlemen on the board made them jump overboard about bringing colour n fun on the mail inbox.. for reasons best knwn to them tht both the apps became a kill to open.. lets home Google doesnt follow the path n retains its simple UI...

Jus hopeless n Listless are the two words to describe my days.. the drive is jus isnt there.. so yet another day in my life chugs by with me doing nothin but cing the sun rise n set. somehow i jus wanted to make a big value addition to me or to the company i was for between the two natural phenomenon.. but to be frank i havent successful more thn 5% of the time.. so far in my career.. and tatz really bad and something tht irks me.. well going home now wat else.. come wat may im gona go for a jog tomm..

Well did almost everything i wanted to do but then the result was negative.. Went to the RTO but then came back for want of a "solid" address proof from the employer.. went to TIME.. well looked impressive but then am always skeptical about the quality of the MockCATS they conduct and also tht i wouldnt be able to take both Time and IMS SimCAT.. hence put off the decision till i visit IMS.. Well then tat saturday went on a wild goose chase to catch a quite IT comps near the airport road, CV Raman Nagar area.. but then couldnt find any other thn the DELL on Intermediate ring road.. well as far as the helicopter division of HAL on Airport road and then returned back to take a cut into Thippasandra.. Man you should the investments the govt has made in the two public sector behemoths the HAL and BEML.. it is jus mind boggling.. one wonders if the output from both these giants justify the input that goes into running these units.. so all along the road i was jus rattling abt 30 kmph watching the huge complexes.. well the objective was to find CV Raman nagar but then i had reached Old Madras Road.. wat then took the next right into 80ft road n went in search of the LIC Housing Units in Jeevan Bhima Nagar which we had applied for allotment.. well the whole main road is decked with these plots.. most of them whole front sides hav to converted to smalll shops. thus robbing the look of the tiled houses.. most of them hav lost their color n looked dull in total contrast to wat was once my dream home when i had gone to c them about 12 years bak..
Well sunday began with my failed trip to IMS.. well rather surprisingly i found the place without any hassle.. but then office was closed.. but proabbaly i wd go for IMS.. considering their hefty fee would come down afer the discount they wd giv me being their old student.. a good 20%.. but then the next weekend batch is only on may 29th.. a long time indeed.. thn bak home.. lazed away took the BRM after a good 3 yrs.. well maths certainly intersts n fascinates me bcoz anything which is not monotonous n thrillling intersts me these days esp after 3 yrs in applications software..

Having a long day well had to get to work for a call at 730am.. but then fixed and closed a couple of issues so dint want to carry too many things going into monday.. when i think i wd hav taken a call on IMS/Time course.. well tomorrow i wd be going to the RTO to get my registration sorted out to Karnataka Number.. and then going around to IMS/Time probably to kickstart officially my preps.. well a bit of nostalgia today as today was when i left iNautix a year back.. well i wd always have great memories of tht company i learnt and I became all tht Im today.. I jus luved the place.. well then bak on monday with lots of news

well then today i got hold of Options after a good long time.. probably the first time i wanted to knw it and hence put my mind into it.. Buy a Call /Writing a Put gives the holder the right not the obligation to buy /sell the underlying equity at a Strike Price within a period of time. Well European and American options then.. Married puts seemed interesting but then i could nt get what exactly it was.. But then atleast i knw wat is wat in Derivative option jargon. This seems a good link

http://www.investopedia.com/university/options/option.asp
Well then had a look at some thing regarding the Configurator demo for the next morning..

Well last nite had dinner from a Dabbawalla it was really good though i felt the quantity of rice was on the lesser side.. the quality of the chappati and the Rajma side dish was really top class... coupled with lady's finger curry and curd had a nice meal.. today well had a couple of checks n updates as JS was back.. well then so was working for quite sometime and then jus starting to go home now.. other than this nothing much happened today.. hope i have a good enuf waiting for me there as yday.. Well the info about the Class 2005 of ISB is available on the site.. well looks impressive.. but then found out hte diploma isnt recognised by AICTE too.. probably bcoz they flaunt the 'so called' admisssion and reservation norms, heard they dont hav the SC/ST one too.. well who cares.. it is the name of the institute which matters rather thn the accrediting body more so if ur certificate is cosigned by the Deans of Kellog, Wharton and Harvard..

Couple of Exciting Trivia
-----------------------------

Jacose, Bellitose, Morose and Comatose are supposed to represent the different states a drunkard could get into.. A beautiful description by the Bard in The Twelfth Night

Whiskey means 'Water of Life', Beer means a 'Drink' , Paparazzi stands for scrap paper..

Well then last nite how can i forget the queue at the hutch bill pay ocunter.. pathetic really spending abt 45 mins to pay ur mobile bills.. i wonder y dont have another counter open during the last 2 days of the bill pay cycle probably this is their way of saying u r late so u r punished so next time pay early and avoid the queue.. Today the usual call with CNVV from HQ... and then still waiting for JS to comment back on the fix suggested.. so again pretty much a easy day.. Wat do I do.. i still ahvent begun with the CAT prep sincerely i need somebody to really kick me out of this slumberness.. dono jus 7 months to go... I JUS WANA MAKE IT.. else i wd nvr be happy with myself for having let myself down for the second time after IIT...

Well had a good break at home and am back.. got a mobile for appa Nokia 1100 well then wat else ate well at home.. probably tatz one reason i go home.. Then as usual had a good anticipation of the journey by Shatabdi well had a short but nice 5 hr sleep and was up to catch the 6am train.. Well the service and the ambience of the train is an example of how good Indian Railways can really match up to International Standards.. Well it started with a Financial Express newspaper and an inhouse Railway Magazine. Well the FE had some really good articles and i read away each and every nook well the focus that day was the elevation of M.S.Banga of HLL India to Head Personal Care Business APAC. Well this move really means HLL is sending a jostle down its ranks to up the ante. It has been steadily losing sales and market share recently and having to carry the dubious tag of a Stock HeavyWeight underperformer. Well in between these had good breakfast and i tried Tea for the first time voluntarily and it really kept me awake for the rest of the journey... So probably Tea will become a staple drink of mine very sooon.. Well then reached office at 1130.. had a nice time meeting n congratulating people on promotions.. well the tension was visible in the air with couple of dissappointments.. personally yes im disappointed.. well as long as im here i think im destined to get things late.. But then only as long... The whole day was very refreshing and i was feeling that activeness in me probably bcoz of the early wakeup and also i felt i learnt the most today and enjoyed the read of the FE.. the more n moer i feel this I realize much more certainly i need to be driving a Business... rather than coding.. Im becoming crazy abt Strategy Mgmt these days.. but then Finance is always and will probably for ever be my passion and first love... though i knw very lil about it to be worthy enuf to call it as my love..

A real surprising decision last nite to go home this weekend.. Well but then more than travel by train which is umpteen times more comfortable than even a Volvo but then the travel by road in Bus excites and thrills me. The only reason i can think of is driving a train is not challenging or does it require the mental alertness as that of a Bus and also the control of the whole vehicle the time of journey , the comfort level of the drive all rests with just one person unlike in train where you have a big network beyond the driver that works for the running for the train.. hence somehow i feel it is very interesting to evaluate the skill level of the driver of a Bus in not just the speed but even his subtleness in gear shift, the gear-engine noise ratio he maintains all this is quite intriguing when looked into very carefully.. Well the best drive i had been so far was i cant single out anything very specific well i dont remember a badly driven KSRTC bus ever on my numerous journeys out of Blore.. Well the journey comfort has been one of the best even on Rajahamsa.. plus i would like to add it is not lacklustre or lazy driving.. but some real solid fast drive when the the travelling time has never beyond 7.15 mins ever.. Fine this i would go on abt this let me stop here.. Then another great news has become a Project Lead.. am feeling really happy for her.. well she should have been one quite some time bak.. expecting couple more announcements like this over the next week from others.. and treats along with this..